Friday, May 6, 2011

A New Day

We got some wonderful news yesterday. Princess Kitty had her final FIV/Leukemia test and she came up clean! And she also hasn't had any more seizures in 6 weeks, so that pretty much rules out all of the deadly diseases that might have caused it. Woo Hoo!!!

I feel like an enormous weight has been lifted from my shoulders. Not only does this mean that she doesn't have a deadly disease, it also means that there's no risk of her infecting the other cats, so we can start working on integrating her into the rest of the family. And not the least of it is that my life has suddenly gotten a whole heckuva lot easier. No more meticulous hand washing and clothes changing after playing with her, no more having to be extra careful about keeping her dishes and everything else separate from the rest of the household, and no more low level worrying!

I sort of feel like I can take a deep breath for the first time since she arrived on the scene last fall. I realize this sounds sorta crazy, but it's like I've been in a state of constant low level worry every since she appeared. At first when she was still outside under the tree, I worried constantly that she'd be cold, or that she'd get attacked by another animal or that god knows what would happen to her. Then when the Orange Boy tested positive for leukemia I was sure she had it too, and on and on and on...

And now that things are finally resolving, it's like a huge pressure has been released... one that I didn't even really realize was there. It's silly little things, but it turns out they are huge. Suddenly, I feel like I can hug my cats again without a nagging worry somewhere in the back of my mind that I might be inadvertantly infecting them with a deadly disease. What an enormous relief.

Maybe Princess came to teach me something. I mean, letting go of control has never been my strong suit, and the past 6 months have definitely been a lesson in lack of control. I'm sure there will be new challenges as she gets integrated with the other cats, and we still don't know what triggered her seizure (I personally think it was the vaccines), but for the first time in months I feel like I can actually let my guard down a bit.

And in a funny way, Princess is the one who got me going on decluttering. Sitting down in the basement with her for hours on end, surrounded by all of my junk really made me realize how much I wanted to change. I'm working on carload number three and it's getting WAY easier, especially since I'm starting to see progress. Today I unearthed a box full of newspapers from 12 years ago. Not papers with any special meaning... just stuff I was hanging onto in case I needed packing materials. Oy Vay!

A new day is dawning... a new chapter is beginning. I don't know how it's gonna turn out or what will happen, but it sure feels wonderful to move forward, and I feel lighter already.

Happy, happy, happy days!


  1. Thank goodness for a healthy kitty and for new beginnings. :)

  2. Glad to hear the good news on Princess Kitty!

    Good luck with the decluttering. We're making some similar efforts in our apartment. I didn't even click the links in your previous decluttering post, because I think they would be too depressing. Maybe they provide a good end goal, but I need some smaller, more manageable goals along the way!

  3. Fantastic that you feel this new freedom...of relief.

    I hope you have this feeling for many many many more days to come...

  4. Hey Steph... well, I guess you've gotta take the good days when you can get them. A few days after I wrote this, Princess tried to claw the eye out of one of my other cats. Actually it was sort of a fluky accident... she got scared and started swatting... he got scared and started running and he ended up with a corneal laceration and a 2am trip to the emergency vet.

    Sigh... So we're still doing medication every few hours and hoping it will heal, and I'm reminding myself that it's a journey and not a destination!


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